Fresh Baked

Thursday, June 16, 2005

The Return of the Leg

The pain in my leg never actually went away. It's kinda shifted to be something a little longer (up from the length of an "ow" to a whole "motherfucker" long) and somewhat more tolerable, but, as this has gone on for the past 8 months, has simply just shifted into something really, really annoying.

I've seen a few doctors (4. 4 doctors, and 1 physical therapist) and nobody seems to have an answer for me. My doctor and I were talking the other day and she laughed and said that I have a funny habit of getting these odd, undiagnosable issues. Oh yeah, hysterical. Like that one time (ha ha ha) when the bones in my foot (hee hee hee) started to separate from one another (nyuck nyuck nyuck) for no apparent reason? It was a laugh riot. And, unfortunately... she's totally right.

But there has been one thing that they all can agree on. You see, this thing happens when you're involved in sports for the better half of your life-- you build muscle. So when the neurologist is doing his smattering of tests that involve you to push your legs against him and he starts to get these little beads of sweat on his forehead? And when the physical therapist has to stop his battery to take a breath? It's apparent that that muscle isn't going to go away. So they say things like, "Heh... you're my work out today!" and "You're as strong as an ox!" And let me tell you-- right here and for free-- nothing makes a girl feel more dainty and feminine as hearing that she's as strong as an ox.

So thats the count for now. Oxen 1, Diagnoses (Diagnosii?) 0. An MRI is next-- I hope I hear that I lay like a brick or something equally attractive.