Fresh Baked

Monday, February 28, 2005

A Whole Lotta Awesome. Because I Feel Like It.

Saturday I wore my new awesome t-shirt and many awesome things happened. Such as:

- I found $7 while doing my laundry.
- I acquired software that I was searching for
- Less than Awesome: While searching the candy aisle in the 99 Cent store for a zoo project I'm working on? I found a razor blade. Sitting on top of the piles of candy. At just the right height for little fingers to reach in and meet their doom. So I took it to the register but the woman did not care AT ALL that they could have been responsible for the chopping off of little kid's hands.
- And then, Coinstar. But part two of that awesome comes later, and possibly in guest spotlight form, because I am just not up to it.

Because that part, awesomely, took away from homework. And frankly, I'm an idiot, so all the homework I'd done on this project up till Friday was scrapped, giving me more homework I wouldn't have had if I had paid attention to directions. So yesterday when I got down to it, I was totally down. To the point that I had to set alarms for myself to shower and go to dinner. And when I came back from dinner? Down again. I owned this project. All the way until 5:30 this morning when it wouldn't print. Sonofa! It was decidedly less than awesome.

All is well now; I was able to get it printed-- and earned a "Wow, this is nice" comment from the notoriously crabby printer people. As for me? I'm totally out of it in the head.

I have what I would call Tetris-brain. Remember how after playing Tetris for hours and hours (... um, yeah... as if anyone would actually do that!) you would replay it in your head or see a building and try to figure out the best place to put it in the row? I'm experiencing the same thing, but with colors. Everything I've looked at today I have analyzed down to it's Illustrator roots, even going so far as to figure out how many color swatches it would take to make the best gradient or if something would work better as a blend. It's a sickness. It's also causing increased ADD and I wind up doing very rude things like taking apart printers when someone is telling me very serious sad news. And slightly less rude things like not giving the kind folks at the 'Bucks my coffee change but, c'mon, people! Coinstar doesn't take dollars.

Or writing posts that have no discernable point, like this one and pretty much every one before it.

But here is my still life illustration. I display it for you awesomely:

Be still like vegetables. Lay like broccoli.

Friday, February 25, 2005

I Heart Music

February. 'Tis the month of hearts and roses... ah, l'amour! And one of the things I ah, l'amour the most is some bitchin' music. Bring it on:

American Music-- Violent Femmes
Angel of Music-- Phantom of the Opera
Can't Stop the Music-- Village People
Fight Music-- D12
Ghetto Musick-- Outkast
Good Music-- Joan Jett
I Can Hear Music-- Beach Boys
I Hear Music-- Billie Holiday
Let the Music (Lift You Up)-- Reba McEntire
Let the Music Play-- Barry White
Let the Music Play-- Shannon
Listen to the Music-- Doobie Brothers
Make Your Own Kind of Music-- Mama Cass
Music-- Madonna
Music Gets the Best of Me-- Sophie Ellis Bextor
Music is the Victim-- Scissor Sisters
Rock and Roll Music - Chuck Berry
Six String Music-- Jimmy Buffett
Dance to the Music-- Sly & the Family Stone
When I Hear Music-- Debbie Deb
Thank You for the Music-- ABBA

**An intense amount of thanks (INTENSE! Feel the stare of thanks upon you!) goes to:

Dem, Leo, Bean, Lushy, Cat, Jodi, Hudson, and this totally rad website that Eia found. They were all given the task of helping me assemble this 'all song titles must contain the word Music' chaos of a CD and I think they are the best. Intensely the best.

Friday, February 18, 2005

Rip. Slip. Brush.


Thursday, February 17, 2005


When I ordered my copy of Harry Potter 6 in October, I didn't think I'd hear too much about it again until July. But yesterday I received an email telling me that it would not be available and I needed to look for it elsewhere. Eehh? That didn't make sense at all. I'm glad the people in charge thought so, too. This was part of the follow-up email I received this morning:

We assure you that howlers have been sent to the muggles responsible for this action and we are investigating the possibility that You-Know-Who may have been involved.

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

And There Went My Grade...

Yesterday, I told my teacher I thought he was a jerk. Smooove. And as the words "you're a jerk..." came out of my mouth I had a OHSHIT! ohshitgetafuckingfilter side thought and finished up with "... and that is just Awesome!" What? I have no idea.

But he laughed. Somewhat convincingly.

Man, I am so screwed.

Monday, February 14, 2005


Hope everyone has a great VD.

Friday, February 11, 2005

Like Thoughts Through the Sieve of My Brain...

How could you guys not have reminded me about my oh-so-radical-totally-incredible news?

Last Friday I was at Best Buy (and I totally scored the best buy ever, ps) and do you know who I saw?? Peter Reckell. Standing up in the Geek Squad area like a pushy, pushy customer.

Of course, at first I thought he was my old neighbor. Then assumed a Reality TV guy like one of the model-types from Amazing Race. But no. BO! I wonder if he was buying his daughter/mother/sister/lover a nice optical mouse?

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

You Got Some Smudge on Your Forehead

Happy Ash Wednesday and Chinese New Year!

I'm only participating in one of these events today, but I'm doing it with gusto. Pa and I went to Church this morning at 6:30 for our smudging. Man, I'm good. At least, until it comes to the sacrifice portion of the season...

Yesterday I told type a that I was considering giving up calling other drivers on the freeway Nasty Twats. This morning? I said it twice, not 20 minutes out of Mass. Sadly, this is an improvement over last year when I thought I'd give up coffee and then left church and went to Java City. On to Plan B!

Tuesday, February 08, 2005

Red! Delicious!

"God, that's the second apple I've seen and it's killing me!"


"Because I haven't had breakfast."

Dude? It's 3:30. I think you've missed more than breakfast. And also? Why don't you cry about it, you big drama baby.

Saturday, February 05, 2005

The Dance-off Begins in 11 Minutes

Hello? Guys? Is it still spinning? I mean, I know Earth spins, but... it's not spinning as fast as it was on Friday night, is it? No? Okay... phew.


Friday night was a great one. Early Saturday morning (and most of Saturday, actually) was not. Because perhaps better than a house warming is the house cooling; a party where your sole purpose is to drink because alcohol is too heavy to move. Leo and Dem, soon to be Home Owners (go escrow!), had us up for the evening to help out in the kicking o' the bottle. Let's begin, shall we?

Sharla, our Number One (#1!!) Jam girl was in the hizzy! Knox Knox jokes abound!


And she just happened to have posters! With which she could point out the Fraudulent Jam (hello, the name of my next band) girls who are a disgrace to the uniform.

(Drink! Drink!!)

But not so many posters that she could go on signing all night. No. Who would get them would be decided with a dance off. Guys! A Dance Off!!

Now, I may need some help here... See, I don't actually remember their being a dance off. I remember Sharla checking the clock and declaring it starting in 11 minutes. I remember Leo and I started stretching. And then I got another re-fill. But there was no Girls Just Want to Have Fun-type competition. But when I hear 'Dance off' there is no controlling myself. I must perform!!

I also had some sly spin and slide moves that were not captured on film. And if that's not enough! There was a mighty engagement in 80s theme songs and movies. Demonstrations of proper Cobra Kai Dojo conduct were provided. Fear does not exist in this dojo, does it?

(Drink! Drink!! Drink!!)

So, being as I was the drunk obnox, and as I made an ass of myself as often as possible, I got an autographed poster-- I'm so honored!

Other things of note: There was an ill-advised shot of vodka had. Eia told me later that the minute she saw me take it she knew I would be sick. Umm... she was right. Also, I got my Merry Jingle present at the end of the night when Dem and I had a conversation in Spanish, or what probably passed for Spanish after too much Jack Daniels. AND! There was a brief video made of Jack and his clapping talents. But, as I care for my life, it will not be shown here. That, my friends, is restraint.

This bitch is cooled.

Thursday, February 03, 2005

This Just In: I'm Not Heartless!!

So, my teacher (yes! It's the return of the teacher who finally, after weeks and weeks of prodding, fixed my grade!)... I have him AGAIN and it's a subtle shade of misery I wear every Thursday. But today I was especially dreading class. Until we found out that my teacher is in the hospital and they don't know when he's getting out. Yikes.

But here's the good news: I care! I do! I really hope he gets better, even though I know it will mean another full quarter of the pedantic pontifications (with a puny peen). Isn't that good of me?

Wednesday, February 02, 2005

So the Fish Screwed Me

As much as I would like to say sweet things about Beth, I'm skipping it for a time when I also don't want to hit her just a little bit. Because I know as soon as I post this I will think of 10 other songs that would fit each category so much better than what I have. Also, this is now the third time I've tried to finish this today and I've resorted to making up some answers.

1. Song that sounds like happy feels:
Dolly Parton's "Why'd You Come In Here (Looking Like That)." It has nothing to do with the lyrics, but the overall tone just cracks me up. I don't think there has been a time that I've heard that song and not laughed.

Leo Sayer's "You Make Me Feel Like Dancing" and Tavares' "Heaven Must Be Missing An Angel" could also fall into this category for the similar reasons.

2. Earliest memory:
Lots of Irish music. Specifically, "All God's Creatures Got A Place in the Choir." The best part is that it still gets played in the house and when I was home a few weeks ago my dad and I sang it together. He gets his bass really low and it cracks me up just as much now as it did when I was 6.

3. Last CD you bought:

The Zuton's "Who Killed... the Zutons" and I am so impressed with myself for remembering that.

4. Reminds you of school:

Elementary School
(I'm assuming this also includes Jr. High)
I don't think I understood music until I was about thirteen because why would anybody want to just sit there and listen to something when there was TV? Punky Brewster took precedence. But I do remember winning 2 tapes from doing magazine sales and choosing REM's Out of Time. The other tape was either Nelson or Wilson Phillips and right now I'm not prepared to let myself sort through those memories to figure out which.

Middle school was also the turning point for me because I started down the road to Reba. I doubt there is one person in my life from that time who wouldn't associate me with Reba because I made them all sick of her.

High School

Again with the Reba. A lot of Sarah McLachlan and Tracy Chapman's Fast Car over and over and over and over...

Sublime, The Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Barenaked Ladies and Dixie Chicks came into play, as well as about a thousand others I can't think of. There was also a huge Nelly Furtado uprising in my senior year.

Specific songs were Cisco's Thong Song and the Venga Boys' Venga Bus because I always misheard it and thought they were saying my name.

5. Total music files on your PC:
My parents have, courtesy of me, about 2,000. Home has about the same and work has 1,660 (and I cleared off 2 gigs last week).

6. Song for listening to repeatedly when depressed:
Cathie Ryan's Somewhere Along the Road and Kate Rusby's Who Will Sing Me Lullabies.. Anything Irish, actually, because it will do one of two things: Make me even more depressed because God can it be sad and haunting, or make me want to move my feet and get over it.

7. Song that sounds British, but isn't:
Zutons Pressure comes to mind... and if it wasn't for the fact that they actually are British, this might be an acceptable answer.

8. Song you love, band you hate:
I can't think of any. I'm pretty good at hating something and never going back, so I've probably protested potential songs on priciple. I do have some problems with both Garth Brooks and Van Morisson but get over it enough to enjoy their songs.

9. A favorite song from the past that took ages to track down:
Going back to the Irish songs from little-hood, my entire family has spent months searching for The Irish Rovers' Children of the Unicorn. What we eventually wound up doing was finding someone to transfer it off vinyl and onto CD. It's a horrible copy, but it's nice to have.

I also waited patiently for years for Disney to put the Pete's Dragon soundtrack out. I have it now and it's wonderful, but for some reason all of Red Button's lines are missing and it drives me crazy.

10. Bought the album for one good song:
I would actually have to look at my CDs to come up with the right answer for this, but I will admit (sadly) that I searched-- SEARCHED for the Parent Trap Soundtrack because I liked Nat King Cole's L-O-V-E. I don't know what was wrong with me- it's not like it's not on any other CD.

11. Worst Song to Get Stuck in your Head:
Baby Beluga. My sister taught her 1st grade class this song and she would come home singing it. When I went to visit her in school, I had 20 first graders screaming this song at me. And now its back again. Damnit!

12. Best song to dump a beer on someone's head to, then storm out of the bar?
My first thought after reading this question was of Grease. Why? Because thats how my brain works. I can't think past it now, though so there will be no answer for this question unless anyone will agree that Raining on Prom Night would work.

On a side note: I'm a big fan of storming out. I try to do it once a week if possible, even if I have no reason.

13. Who should do this next?
Holz and Bad Penguin

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

You Need to Tell Me These Things!!

Excuse me, guys? Why hadn't anyone told me how FUCKING BRILLIANT Not Another Teen Movie is?? Brill. Absolutely.

Also brilliant is the new Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr Pepper commercial with the Mahna Mahna song. Even though the drink sounds like it A.) will rot my teeth in .02 seconds and B.) should be ordered at a coffee house with all the multisyllabic specifications, it might be on the 'must try' list.

What else haven't you shared with me?