Fresh Baked

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

I Am STILL Dying

Yesterday Dem and I had a great email conversation, which I will share for all to see. Consider yourself warned, though. You might die by the end of it (hopefully; my perception is skewed by momentum and the fact that I think Dem is one of the funniest people on the planet so I'm pretty much laughing before I read what she has to say).


From: Me
To: Dem
Subject: Volcano X

I just had a nasty thought about how Volcano X kills black heads and then I thought about Malcom X and wondered if there was anything to be said that wouldn't be racist. I doubt it. This made me think of Reno 911 when Wiegel was very obviously going to say something racist and Jones stopped her, so she switch paths and said, "I was not going to say anything racist, I was going to say something in French. But you interrupted so now I won't. Want to hear it anyway? Au Bon Pain." And then she said something about a dog and it was funny, but I can't find that quote anywhere so that was strictly from memory and therefore filled with holes. I'm Swiss, baby!

That does nothing to lead me to my point, which is: Do you use Volcano-X 1-Day Acne Cream made with Organic Sulfur? Because Eia does and she's nearly out and its hard to find, but I found some and want to know if you need some, too. And that was a whole lotta reading for one silly question, so... Sorry.

Oh! And I don't think I'll be able to talk to Sharla anymore without looking at her REAL boobs. Thanks, Dem!



HAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! That is clever. Way to err on the side of caution re racism, though.

And: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH. Volcano X. I call it volcanox, like a play on Noxzema. A very weak play. I still have some left, but thank you so much for the kind offer. Where did you find it? I hear that Mother's wasn't delivering the last time Jodster looked.

Did you see that Sharla now has what Leo terms a "commanding lead".

xoxox



Herbal Remedies --Take that, Mother(s). I think this would make a lovely Valentine's day present for Eia, don't you? And just so I'm sure I'm biting correctly: is the correct mispronunciation Vol-Can-Nox?

Sharla is, indeed, kicking ass. I think Bunny and his engineers had a hand in getting her score up there.

SWAK!



I say "vawl-kay-nocks"

Actually, I just changed it. In light of discussion re Sharla, it's now volcaknockers



Volcanox-nox.

Who's there?

The knockers of the Most Jammin' Jam Girl, Sharla.

BaaaaHAHAHAHAHAHA



Bwahhh!

I just died. I'm dead. It was just too funny



It was a murder/suicide. Did we leave a note?



There's an entire e-paper trail. Problem is, any one who reads it will face the same fate. Because it's (wait for it) booby trapped.

HAHAHAHAHAHA



Hooo, boy... if you're still alive-- thanks to any of you who voted yesterday; thanks to Sharla for letting us misuse her chest. Thanks to Eia for acting surprised when you get your oh-so-filled-with-love Valentine. And Dem? Thanks for killing me so often.