Fresh Baked

Friday, October 29, 2004


You guys. You GUYS! I had 6 hours of sleep last night! SIX. Check me, this is the most well rested I have been in weeeeeks. And? AND? I have only had one cup of coffee today. Okay, plus two Cokes, but I'm so proud of me. I feel like I should get a PSL to celebrate.

Also, I'm dog sitting this weekend. Starting last night. Amorous dog is wookin' pa nub again... Poor girl, she is wookin' pa nub in all da wong paces. And I'm pumpkin carving tonight... I have been looking all afternoon (uh... in between times when I was diligently working) for designs that I want to do. I think I'm going to go with a Mondrian theme. Wish me luck!

**To all those I owe CDs... I'm a lazy bitch when it comes to going to the post office. I promise that if I have made you wait for months that I am a.) sorry and b.) really going to try to get those out this weekend and c.) probably going to include extra prizes for you. Not necessarily good ones, though.

Thursday, October 28, 2004


CO6: is it bad luck to look at wedding dresses if you aren't getting married?
FreshBmh: no, i don't think so
FreshBmh: its not bad luck to look at engagement rings if you're not dating, is it?
CO6: definitely not
FreshBmh: too bad. that might have answered a lot of my problems.
CO6: ha ha

Tuesday, October 26, 2004

Calling all Odd Pain Experts

Ya'll just sit back and let me tell you a little story called "Ow." Lately, my legs have been feeling like they're really bruised and sore but without any of the fun of getting them to be in such a state. I don't know what it is, but they hurt. There are no discernable marks in the sore spots, no cuts or bites unaccounted for. But there have been, coming more frequently now, shooting pains that knock me flat. La la la, onward and upward, la la ... oh, shit ow. ow ow OW OW OW. And I have to hold on to something to keep me standing. The first time? I fell face first into my bed. Its just a little shock of fire that runs up from these non-marked parts of my legs and stop just before my hips. Renders me legless. But just for a second or two. Should I be concerned?

Monday, October 25, 2004

Godzilla, of Course

This weekend, the sleep was had. By special invitation, I slept in my old bed in my old home so that I wouldn't be woken by all the hammering and whatnot that was coming to the new home early Saturday morning. Also, I got dinner and exclusive use of the washer and dryer. And was reintroduced to a thing called sitting down and just watching TV when my mom got up and we watched Oprah together at 1am. Our consensus? Renée Zellweger is very unimpressive, Hugh Grant is very delectable, and Oprah needs to give Colin Firth more couch time.

The October CD was created as well. Behold the wonder:

What A Wonderful World - Joey Ramone
You Make Me Feel Like Dancing/ Leo Sayer
Are You That Somebody / Aaliyah
Let's Misbehave / Elvis Costello
Keep It Together / Guster
They / Jem
Somewhere Only We Know / Keane
The Girl From Back Then / Kings of Convenience (Store) (heehee)
Comes A Time / Mutual Admiration Society
Let it Fall / Glen Phillips with Sean Watkins
How You've Grown / Natalie Merchant
Least Complicated / Purple Haze
Come Sail Away / Styx
We Will Become Silhouettes / The Shins
Bruised / The Bens
The Dress Looks Nice On You / Sufjan Stevens
Weak / Stephanie Dosen
Change Your Mind / Sister Hazel
Train Wreck / Sarah McLachlan
Solsbury Hill / Peter Gabriel

The offer for copies still stands.

Friday, October 22, 2004

Fast and Easy

Bah. Tired. Busy. Sick. Bah.

I figured out the reason I'm not feeling well. It goes a little something like this: Work? 30 hours. School? 20 hours. Homework? 30 hours. Which leaves time for vitamins and cold medicine taking at -3.4 minutes. Sorry immune system, but I've got blind contour drawings to do. My personal caffeine intake, however, is at an all time high as I'm hitting about 60oz. a day.

Therefore, due to time constraints and spastic thinking, I give you my week in bullet formation, most of which are boring:
  • I looked worse at 17 than I do at 25. Thanks for the votes and all credit due to my hairdresser.
  • 400 page documents will clog a printer. And it will take me 45 minutes on the phone with Xerox to unclog it. The person who sent this job in the first place will continue to piss me off.
  • I was given an ENTIRE loaf of pumpkin bread, homemade, all for ME, because it's my very favorite. My friends are fabulous.
  • Someone stole my Coke from the office refrigerator. That day I had only 48oz of caffeine. When I find that person, s/he will die.
  • Happy feet can make up for no sleep.
  • There is a Kleenex tucked in my sleeve. I am officially old.
  • When I stay up to do my homework until 4:00 in the effin' morning? I would really appreciate it if the teacher would collect it.
  • A book I've ordered, I'm told, will arrive on the 22th. For those of you counting at home, the 22th is the day after the 21nt.
And to cap off the week, I give you the best thing someone has said to me today: "your personality carries (us). You're like a little girl that people would like to step on."

Thank you and goodnight!

Monday, October 18, 2004

ID Hell

As promised, my ID picture. I'm actually giving you two chances to point and laugh as I'm equally horrified by these. The first one was taken about a week ago and... ugh, it's just frightening! The second one is from 7 years ago. I think it's a toss up to which is worse. But as we're in an election year, I declare we put it to a vote. Weigh in in the comments and remember-- Every Vote Counts.

One more thing that has nothing to do with how un-photogenic I am... I was talking to my friend the other day when I noticed something I didn't like and said, "horseshit." Which would have been really well received if she hadn't put her mom on the phone at that very moment. Her reaction? "Horseshit? Oh, my, she just said horseshit! B, I think you're a sweet girl, but you could use some soap in that mouth." Ah, yes. Delightful.

Thursday, October 14, 2004

Weekend Schmeekend.

Oh, man. It's Thursday and I am just now getting to the correct answer for this past weekend? Let this be a sign of things to come because I am the newly appointed Princess of Where-Has-Time-Gonesville where I also serve as Mayor and Sheriff and Nights watchman. It's a tough job, but somebody has to do it.

Okay, this weekend... was fun, but that's kinda boring now. Too bad I'm going to tell you about it anyway. Friday I finally found bedding that will match my pink/brown room. How many of you are jealous that you don't have a pink/brown room of your very own? A lot, I'm sure. So Friday was the first night in the new place. Tres exciting! And maybe this weekend I can do things like bring my clothes and just about everything else I have over. I've been living like a nomad this week and really? That needs to die.

And I did indeed go to Geekfest 2004 where 5 guys linked up their PCs to play a game in which they shoot each other. Fortunately, there was bad TV on to counteract the overwhelming TechnoWeenie scent in the air. Godzilla vs. Space Godzilla is a horrible movie and we loved it. Porn Star: The Legend of Ron Jeremy was only funny because that guy is... odd. And after that? Virtual Girl. C'mon. A CYBER-HOOKER? That's Awesome!! And on Sunday I did 8 HOURS of homework. For one class. For one assignment of the 4 I have for that same class. Bah!

So the correct wrong answer? E. Congrats to DeAnn for guessing correctly (partial credit to Coleen because, technically, I'm not totally moved). There will be no Mikey kids for moi. I may have obtained some Neverland Ranch paper through less than savory means, but that is the closest I ever want to get to Senor Glove.

Next up: I show you the Worst ID Picture in the History of ID Pictures. I offer this to give you an idea of whats in store.

Monday, October 11, 2004

Pop Quiz, Hot Shots

Which of the following is not true?

This weekend, I:
a.) moved.
b.) watched Godzilla vs. Space Godzilla and then, in a natural segue, Porn Star: The Legend of Ron Jeremy.
c.) spent 8 hours doing ONE homework assignment.

d.) went to the affectionately titled "Geekfest 2004" where 5 guys linked up their PCs to play a game in which they shoot each other. Oh, forgive me, more than 5-- there were others playing from the comfort of their own homes.
e.) had Michael Jackson's baby.

Come, submit your guesses. I will post further on this later.

Thursday, October 07, 2004

Cue the Scary Drama Music!

Things have been a wee bit hectic round these here parts, lately. This week brought on the addition of school to my normal work-week. Oh, and the added bonus of moving. Its all a pain in the ass right now, but I figure it has to get better soon. OR WILL IT???

(dun dun dun DUUUUN)

And, related to that whole school thing-- I had to take a test to get out of a class. Now, as I test just about as well as I interview, I wasn't feeling totally confident going in. But I think I kicked ass just the same. OR DID I??? **

(dun dun dun DUUUUN)

And, related to that whole test-out thing-- Everyone knows how cool Beth is, right? Well, she is. Cool. Possibly the coolest. Because I bugged her all week for help and was super nice and handy, even offering to help me cheat. Which I didn't. OR DID I???

(dun dun dun DUUUUN)

Also cool and handy is the (now non-linkable) Hudson. Who showed me the shortcut icons in Excel which
saved me tons of time and stress, and to whom I may owe my first-born. OR DO I???

(dun dun dun DUUUUN)

Totally unrelated:
My friend had a dream about me last night wherein she found me grilling a small dog on a George Foreman. Apparently, I denied it for a long time, telling her it was a squirrel before she got me to say I had to do it as an assignment for class. Wow. I'm glad I'm only that demented in other people's subconscious. OR AM I???

(dun dun dun DUUUUN, dun DUUUUUUUUUN!)

**Yeah, I totally did.

Monday, October 04, 2004

Dear Keys,

I never lose you. We're tight, you and I and I have never treated you with anything other than respect. You start my car, you let me into my house; I keep you warm and safe. It's a fair trade, I think. So what was the deal with you this weekend?

We went to work together on Friday, we went to that God-awful 4 HOUR orientation at the school and then we went home. I know I went to dinner without you then, but I promise I missed you a little, and knew I'd come home to get you. You had the key for house where I was dog-sitting. I needed you. And you disappeared. I don't think you realize what that did to me. I panicked. I said Oh, Shit a lot. The key. To the house. Of the dog... Oh. Shit. It's a good thing I paid attention when they told me where the spare was so I could get into the garage. As it was after 10, it was pretty dark to begin with, but the garage? Very dark. Very Are The Lambs Still Screaming, Clarice? I used the light from my cell phone to navigate since I didn't have the little light that is where? Right. On my keychain. And the light hit a LIFESIZE cutout of the homeowner. Ahh! I damn near shat myself. Who has such a thing? See keys? This was frightening business.

I still missed you after that but, truthfully, was a little mad at you, too. I wanted to know where you'd gone off to. I looked everywhere- EV. RY. WHERE. for you. No pockets left unchecked, no trash can left unturned. Coffee grinds and banana peels and all that. No keys. Not even a jingle or clink or clank. You are the Keyser Soze of keys.

Saturday I went back on the key-finding mission, ripping all in sight apart. I held conferences with each of the family members I talked to on Friday. Nobody remembered anything. Finally, I dumped out my purse and searched it for the eleventy billionth time. My Mom? She searched hers, too. Want to guess what she found? A $1,000 bill she meant to give me months ago? NO. You. What the hell is up with that, keys? How'd you get in there? Why'd you run off like that? I'm at a loss for the answers.

Grudgingly admitting that I'm glad you're back,
Louis Tully

ps-- and what did you say to the phone to make it want to run away, too?

(20 points for that last reference. dem? I know you won't let me down)