Fresh Baked

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

My Work Threw Us A Safari And All I Got Was This Dumb Post (and a business idea)

Giraffe visor? Check. Pith Helmet? Pithy! Forced enthusiasm? Rrrowrr. Airbrushed tiger pants? Use your imagination, and believe me when I say CHECK! Whats this mean? The safari staff picnic is OVAH!

And this here is my version of a recap, courtesy of my friends Her and IM:

Her: hi
Me: okay the best part?
Me: was the banana eating contest
Me: when all the people in the crowd kept yelling to this woman "swallow!! swallow!!" as she deep throated them
Her: wow. so how many did you eat?
Me: haha.
Me: she ate 6
Me: and beat out this guy who was making a lot of noise about how he'd be the best
Me: by a whole banana at least
Her: gross
Me: pretty much
Her: what else happened
Me: uuhh... Tarzan and Jane yelling contests, volleyball game, African dance lessons, cold food...
Her: weird
Her: when did you start working at Disneyland?
Me: no kidding.

(long pause for work and all, but here comes one of the best business ideas ever-- USPS take note!)

Me: i'm still doing my cds every month and have some for you... but i'm really bad at getting to the post office
Her: oh my gosh i am the worst at that
Her: and I have two post offices in my building
Me: HA
Her: I sort of wish I didn't just tell you that
Me: no-- its a post office... not really a super destination
Her: totally
Her: I mean if it was like the Bahamas for example instead of being the post office, you might be more tempted to go
Her: even if there is a line
Me: or if you knew you'd get free drinks once you got there
Her: oh now that is a great idea
Me: like there was a margarita machine at the door
Her: and chips and salsa
Me: and people feeding you grapes
Her: and tequila shots
Me: which are voluntary, because otherwise, you lost me
Her: wait a second, grapes don't go with our theme
Me: i know, but i like grapes
Her: okay well there will be one line for people like you who get grapes and then there will be one line for my peeps which will have tequila shots
Her: naturally my line will be longer but we'll be drunk so it won't matter
Her: oh how about in the mailtrucks
Her: they can "deliver" you so to speak
Her: with your mail which is convenient
Me: like pink dot
Me: and they'll bring you french fries and shakes at about 2am
Her: i love it

We're writing our proposal right now... think it'll work?