Fresh Baked

Friday, June 25, 2004

Hudson Won't Die

This is a piece of the AIM convo that Hudson and I had yesterday when I decided it was time that she be introduced to The Bean. Not to get too far off topic, but the girl has never been to the Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf in her life. How does she live??

B: Would you die if we got into my car and I was listening to Clay Aiken?
H: Would I die? No, I don't think so. Will I laugh? Oh yeah...
B: What if I was listening to Clay Aiken and started singing along so loudly that the windows popped out and then the glass shards flew into my face and I couldn't see so I jumped the center divider and rolled us down an embankment? Would you die then?
H: I already did all of that in my car, except for the windows popping out bit, so I think we'd be ok. Maybe if we actually flipped...
B: Damnit...WHY WON'T YOU DIE?!!

So, we go to the Bean and we get an eXtreme Caramba! and are enjoying it, as it is eXtremely enjoyable, when we get back into the car and I come thisclose to killing her for realsies.

I guess I said something funny (and I wish I could remember what it was because I love it when I'm funny) that made her laugh so hard I thought she was choking and that surely she'd die and I would have killed her and Shit! that IM screen was still up on my computer and it will be used against me no matter how often I say it was a joke! Then I almost killed her a second time immediately after that because my brain said the only logical thing to do when you're driving a car and the person next to you is choking is to slam your foot so hard on the brakes that the seatbelt gives her the Heimlich. Where in the hell did I come up with that? Why am I trying to kill Hudson? And what does Clay Aiken have to do with any of this?